Why privacy and modesty are important when using apps

Nailah Dean from Salams – the marriage, friendship and networking app – looks at the importance of privacy functions on apps when it comes to searching for a potential partner.

Have you ever been at a big family gathering, or worse, a wedding, and heard your mother telling anyone that would listen that you’re looking to get married? Does that image make you cringe?

Maybe you’re not cringing about your single status (which is nothing to be ashamed about). Maybe you just don’t want complete strangers to know! Privacy concerns are the number one complaint that some single Muslims have when searching for a marriage potential  online. They want to remain aloof while they search for love and marriage.

Salams App has a solution for this issue: Stealth Mode. With a premium membership, Salams users can keep their swiping on the DL. Stealth Mode allows Salams users to stay hidden until they swipe right on someone they like. Only the profiles that pass their muster will be able to view the Stealth Mode user’s profile. Another cool feature of Stealth Mode is that it allows users to hide their online status. This means you are essentially a ghost on the app, checking things out until you’re ready to make a move.

Keeping photos private

In the age of social media, photos are everywhere. The notorious “selfie” photo fills our timelines and feeds. When it comes to finding a spouse, looks are important and a good photo can make a world of difference.

However, there is a countervailing argument that we, as Muslims, should be more mindful about the photos we are putting into the public sphere for purposes of haya (modesty). On the app, there are options to blur your photos before someone swipes right, but that can be off putting for some who need to see a face to connect with along with the biographical information. Stealth Mode is the best of both worlds: it allows users’ photos to remain hidden along with their bio data. Only if the stealth mode user shows an interest will their photo and profile be revealed to that party. This way principles of modesty and privacy are preserved.

Bios can be personal

There are two general groupings of profiles found on the apps: those who write just enough to meet the word count, and those that write their life stories. Both are respectful approaches.

It can be scary to put personal information about who you are and what you are seeking in a spouse out for the general public to see. But there’s also the danger of sharing too few words. For many, especially women who are statistically more likely to read the profiles, finding connection in the person’s description of themselves matters.

If you are someone who is okay with getting a little vulnerable on the profile to increase your chances of finding that emotional connection, you will find comfort in Stealth Mode where your profile will only be visible to those you want to connect with.

Painful First Marriage

For all those looking for love and marriage a second time, you might actually need the privacy that Stealth Mode affords. Divorce can be a tricky thing. It’s complex and it can be painful.

While it’s nothing to be ashamed of, the rumour mill that unfortunately exists in some pockets of our community, may create problems for individuals looking for love and marriage again. Stealth Mode allows one to avoid unnecessary scrutiny. Users can feel more comfortable writing “divorced” on their profiles without a whole bunch of extra people seeing and potentially speaking about it without their knowledge.

Finding Love is Personal

The fact that people might find out you’re on the apps looking for marriage, might make you feel queasy. That’s understandable. Love and marriage are personal endeavours that we might not want to share with the world.

However, with time, you might grow to appreciate being visible online. There are benefits to having people know you’re on the hunt, because Muslims are supposed to support one another, and that includes supporting one in the creation of a family. Maybe someone you know IRL might see you on the app, but maybe they’ll tell their best friend about you, and maybe their best friend is the one you’re supposed to marry.That’s how “inorganic” moments can become “organic.”

If you’re not at that comfort level yet, Stealth Mode is a great place to start!

*Sponsored content: Salams is one of Islam Channel’s commercial partners

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